U-Turn

There have been a few situations in my life that were my responsibility to get out of, but yet, try as I might, I always ended up back stuck. My marriage was one, my weight another. My experience is so intensely spiritual, physical and emotional. None can be separated from the other.

Making healthy choices with food has always been important to me, not that I always made healthy choices. There was stress every time we had drive through, whenever I shared 'junk food' with my kids. What I call junk food casts a wide net compared to the average populace. The kids were mostly fed healthfully, although my treat eating spilled over into indulgences I shared with them.

The stress I felt over the poor food choices weighed on me and I handled it with more indulgences to my taste buds, to the point where I often ate like a child, denying myself nothing, after the kids where in bed, or when I was alone. My body was paying the price. My cholesterol was high, over 300, however, my good cholesterol was also high, over 60. I was a slave to the party in my mouth. Hopeless. Against the values I hold, yet I couldn't stop.

I prayed God would save me from myself, that he'd fix me. He didn't. He did speak in that still, small voice, and I usually ignored him in the arena of food. In February of this year, at my Bible study, the theme was repentance, using the analogy of U-turns. I had been doing partial U-turns in my repentance for the way I was eating. So sorry, so disgusted by my behavior, I was saddened and sorry for the results of my behavior, but I'd continue. I didn't turn my back on the way I had been eating, because I just couldn't. After the Bible study, I told God, I want to turn my back on the way I've been eating, but I can't. Please help me.

Sounds hokey, but it was the next week I went on this elimination diet that was supposed to last 7 days before adding back foods, then growing the diet back to include the things that had been cut out. Every food that we tried to add back in, I had a reaction to! There are so many foods that I am sensitive to. My reactions included joint pain, extreme fatigue, inability to get up in the morning, stabbing pains in my abdomen. My eating has changed drastically since then. I miss mindlessly eating Oreos and seasonal candies, but really, they never satisfied.

This was just the prelude to what I learned about my body, the adrenal system, and food allergies/sensitivities. The adrenal system is the source for hormone production that handles stress. The body cannot discern internal/externals stressors, it reacts the same for both. When you are in an argument, car accident, or are eating foods you are sensitive to, your adrenals put out cortisol. Sometimes your other hormones have to take a back seat in order for your body to handle the amount of stress your adrenals are under. The regulatory hormones of DHEA, Pregnenalone, progesterone, your thyroid, they all take the hits so the adrenals can give the 'fight-or-flight' response you need for survival. However, once your adrenals have been called upon too long, they get exhausted. They are walnut shaped gland above your kidneys. They shrivel up to little peas and don't put out much anymore. Throughout this process your thyroid tries to keep up, some peoples thyroid slows, to match the adrenals (they dance together), once your adrenals shut down your thyroid may go so low it's considered hypothyroid. The bad news is once you go hypothyroid, it doesn't come back, but the good news, your adrenals can be brought back. Over time of healthy eating and exercise, not eating foods you have sensitivities to. I'm doing clinical nutrition to try to bring back my adrenals faster than they would otherwise come back.

The adrenal test is a saliva test, the thyroid is a blood test, the gluten sensitivity test is a blood test. That's just FYI, not that you need to run out and get them. I am going to a clinic that has free seminars each month on different health related topics. I learned more info than I could share in an email from there, and a book the directors of the clinic wrote: The Gluten Effect. It has chapters on other health things besides gluten sensitivity, but the primary purpose of the book is to inform about gluten sensitivity.

My journey with food has been wrought with difficulty. I was a slave to it, and now, the way I have to feed us is very challenging, requiring energy and attentiveness, however, I have a freedom I haven't known in a very long time. This has been intensely spiritual as well as physical. I cannot tell my story without sharing the spiritual component, or it wouldn't be true. I receive relief from the arthritic joints about a week after being clean from whichever food causes that problem. Citrus is a big one, vinegar. The moodiness, clears after 2 or so days of being clean of the problem food like corn. The challenge I had with yelling, wow, how it can be related to foods, seemingly 'healthy' foods. Wow! Once my intestines heal, I should be able to add back some or all of the foods I cannot eat now. Time and healing. I wasn't crazy! I thought I was beyond hopeless in some of these areas, and by avoiding some foods, I have such freedom!

This manuscript sure is growing! How many cups of coffee just to get to this point?! While I was typing this, my boys were on the trampoline in the backyard, where I sent them in hopes of peace to think and write. Malachi was making a beeline like a bat out of hell(that dramatic, it warrants that description!) towards the house. His nose was bleeding, some went into his mouth and he sputtered it out all over the place. Trying to keep the carpet clean and comfort him were nearly equal priorities! Caleb ran off to get some tissue to hold over the nose. Caleb had, on Malachi's request, thrown a broom(full sized) over the net onto the trampoline. Of course it hit Malachi on the nose and his 2 front loose teeth. Couldn't have hit the target better if he had aimed. AH, life. This stress, I can deal with:)